The Origin of 'Tast's Pack'
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For the Item of the same name, see The Origin of 'Tast's Pack' (Item). |
 The Origin of 'Tast's Pack'
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| File:The Origin of 'Tast's Pack' (lorebook).png Hint: Found in random loot
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| Category: | Gods
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| Area: | N/A
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| Visibility: | Ghosted Until Found
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The Origin of 'Tast's Pack' is a Lorebook very rarely found in random loot.
Content
The Origin of "Tast's Pack"
By Eladrigan the Gifted, Official Scribe of Jamurra
(Council Annotated Edition, Sixth Printing)
[Most of the pages of this book have been torn out. Only the last page of the story remains, along with copious annotations.]
...
Right here?" asked Norala, smiling a toothy grin.
"Of course," said Tast, licking Norala's fingers. "In order to truly trust my new general, I must know her inside and out."
THE END.
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Councilwoman Irasce's notes from the first printing: According to the elves of Verta, this travesty is the official version of the story of Tast's Pack. I have removed a lengthy rape sequence and two other sexual encounters of a complex nature. All these scenes were told in luridly salacious detail, and I for one am not amused. "Making reading fun again" indeed!
While I've removed the most heinous sequences, I could not remove every objectionable element, for doing so reveals the truth: the entire story could easily be summed up in a few sentences! "Long ago, Norala challenged Tast to a one-on-one fight. Tast won handily, but Norala cheated and had other gods help her overcome Tast. Tast was impressed with her deviousness, and the group of them became allies." There. That's the whole story. Human scholars, you're quite welcome.
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Councilwoman Irasce's notes from the second printing: I have been made aware of a formal complaint lodged by the original book's author, Eladrigan "the gifted". It is Eladrigan's opinion that since my annotated edition consisted almost entirely of excisions, not annotations, that I committed some sort of ... I don't know, some elven ethical atrocity. This is nonsense: I did not hide the fact that I removed the smut from Eladrigan's version, so by human standards, there was no error made, and I do not at all acknowledge having made an error here.
However, in the interest of continued good relations between our two great nations, I have released this second printing of my annotated edition, wherein I have left every lewd scene intact. I am deeply sorry if this version causes any human reader psychological harm.
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Councilwoman Irasce's notes from the third printing: It is now something of a joke among the literate class that my second printing has sold out, whereas my first edition has not. I can see the humor, but the cause is quite simple: by lodging a complaint, Eladrigan drew attention to the story in a way that would never have happened otherwise. I'll note that Eladrigan has a new book for sale, and not coincidentally this volume also details the further exploits of Tast and Norala. I'll let the reader draw their own conclusions. My first edition remains available for dedicated scholars who do not have time for tawdry nonsense.
... And I do mean nonsense! After significant searching, I have located what I believe to be the oldest written version of this story, a transcription from the god Ir-Hetsu, from 7000 years ago. For reference, here is the famous "pack leader" scene, as told by Ir-Hetsu:
- Gulagra and Remga each held one of Tast's arms, and Norala beat him mercilessly for hours, sliced him with her claws, stabbed him with her blade. But he would not die, and as day turned to night, Norala's wrath eventually waned. Seeing this, Tast laughed. Yes, Tast laughed, even as he bled! "You pretend to be the god of the hunt, but you cannot hunt me! One-on-one, I can easily control you. With the aid of friends you can BRIEFLY hold me, but try as you might, you still cannot kill me! You are no hunter! Your godhood is false, and in time, I swear that I will destroy you."
- At hearing this, Norala smiled. "Finally! Let him go, friends." Gulagra and Remga released Tast, and he rose to his feet with a mixture of anger and confusion. Then Norala bowed down to him, and the other two followed her lead. "Tast, you will lead us."</indent>
- Tast beckoned at the heavens and a column on dark power blasted down upon him, healing him completely. "Lead you? No, I will destroy you all!"
- Norala shook her head. "You ask how I can be the god of the hunt? I don't need to be the strongest hunter: I simply need to have the strongest hunter in my pack. You are the only god fit to lead our pack. And you need us. You need ME! You finally admitted that you were easily waylaid by a god FAR weaker than you. I cannot kill you, but had I truly meant you harm, I would have asked Gulagra to carry you into the sun again. No, I am your ally, Tast, and you need my guidance before one of your true enemies outmaneuvers you and takes your power. So you will lead our pack, and we shall be your eyes and ears, your fists and blades. Together, we shall defy Lo-Maj and rule all the gods!"
The scene continues for a while, but this is enough to illustrate my point: note how many sexual references have intruded so far? None! In fact, Ir-Hetsu's version contains only a single sex act, told somewhat tastefully, and with some effort made to suggest that both parties were consenting. Although given the situation, the validity of that consent is perhaps dubious... but the point is that the entire story contains a single erotic scene, leaving more room for important details.
Ir-Hetsu is an elven god, and if he can limit his story to only one lewd act, I expect better from the "Official Scribe of Jamurra" than this sorry nonsense.
But as I have said before, I mean no ill will toward the great nation of Verta.
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Councilwoman Irasce's notes from the fourth printing: The third printing sold out even faster than the second. There are many reasons why this could be, but I believe the main reason is simple: the previous edition added valuable annotations, so it was the most complete and useful version. I am grateful to my readers, and I wish to make this new printing the most successful yet! Here are additional important details that were not made clear in the original text.
- Although we refer to Tast's allies as "Tast's Pack", Tast himself never uses this term. He often calls them his "Generals."
- Which gods are in Tast's Pack? That depends on the particular myth. Norala, Gulagra, and Remga are usually included. In stories that take place after the God War, the Pack usually includes Tuvillus as well. Melkar is sometimes also a member of the "pack." Tales that feature Melkar usually contend that he is Tast's illegitimate son, as if gods would care about something like mortal marital legitimacy!
- Although Gulagra is by far the most powerful of Tast's "generals", Norala actually features more often in stories about him. She is supposedly the inventor of "guerilla warfare", and she also appears in many stories as a spy or provocateur for Tast.
- Gulagra becomes more important in later stories. By the time of the God War, Gulagra is as powerful as Tast, and the two are seen as equals. Norala was Tast's right-hand in the God War, but she was clearly not his equal in power.
- Remga shows up often in Tast's myths but is usually just an ancillary character, as he is in this story. However, one notable myth has Remga inventing "war brides"; another has him taking center stage in an epic sea battle. As with most stories involving the god of rape, the details are not for the squeamish.
Lastly, I want to address the issue of sexuality head-on. Yes, it's clear that Tast and Norala's avatars have had sexual relations at some time in the past -- we can confirm this from several unbiased historical texts. But it's important to notice the form these gods take: they are both orcish gods. This story took place in a time before the human race came to prominence, a time when orcs and elves vied for control of vast continents. So you might argue that they are orcish gods "by default". But gods can change their avatars over time if they choose, yet even today both remain orcs. This is important because orcs are a primitive version of humans.
Orcish physiology is technically capable of experiencing love (unlike elves), but most orcs cannot muster such a grand emotion, and instead feel a sort of sexual urgency, a violent lust like an animal. By taking the form of orcs, I posit that Tast and Norala are signaling that their relationship is more a partnership of warriors than a romance for the ages.
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Councilwoman Irasce's notes from the fifth printing: I have once again received a complaint from Eladrigan, just in time for the release of his new novel. Eladrigan claims that my previous edition made racially inaccurate remarks. Eladrigan may be a capable writer of smut, but a scientist he is not!
It's important to understand that I used the scientific definition of love, and elves simply cannot experience this emotion: it's a phrenological fact that elven skulls lack the Love Area. Thus they are incapable of love. Orcs have this brain area, although for most specimens it is quite small and undeveloped.
Elves no doubt experience other sensations of fondness for one another -- I do not suggest elves are incapable of kindness, in their way. But the term "love" refers to a primarily human emotion!
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Councilwoman Irasce declined to include any notes for the sixth printing, except to once again reaffirm her dedication to harmony with the great nation of Verta.
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